I’m 52. I’m a victim of long term trauma starting the day I was born, resulting in CPTSD.

I didn’t think I would make it to 30, let alone 52.

I have been exactly where you are so many times. I understand the feelings of giving up and giving in.

I know it doesn’t feel like it, but you are ok and you are experiencing normal feelings after trauma (traumas!).

I would like to see you learn how. Learn how to sit in your new mind. Learn how to not feel so exhausted. Learn how to accept love and support. Learn how to know, deep in your bones, you are not alone. Learn what “being strong"really looks like. Being strong is not feeling no emotion. It is not the opposite of feeling weak. Being strong is actually doing exactly what you are doing. Processing and expressing. Reaching out. Making your innermost fears public. Being strong is also recognizing your own fragility and giving yourself a break. Or two. Or ten.

Being strong is recognizing when you need help and being able to ask for it.

You’ve done both.

I don’t know where you are in your mental health journey and I don’t want to sound preachy but I would be remiss in not mentioning there is concrete help out there. Therapy and medication can be so helpful. The medication can allow you to be able to absorb and use the skills therapy will teach.

That’s all I’ll say on that. I’m coming off as “know it all lady" to myself.

You are so well regarded at our little publication. I for one feel honored you’ve chosen to write for us. There is no obligation attached to that, or any, statement. You have no obligation to respond.

I am wishing you all the good things. Life seems to be hardest on the most sensitive.

You have my Twitter and I’m always willing to DM.