***This story contains graphic drug use. Please read with caution.****

Home. The First Time

How I became addicted to IV meth use

Photo by Sara Bakhshi on Unsplash

I’m sitting on the toilet in my mother’s bathroom. I have a $40.00 baggie of meth in one hand and a 20cc syringe filled with water in the other. I squirt the water from the syringe into the baggie, dissolve the crystals of meth and draw the thickened liquid back into the syringe. I don’t bother using a cotton.

I have, at this point, never shot meth. I’ve snorted it, smoked it, and eaten it, but never injected it. A few months ago I found a couple of insulin syringes at a friend’s house. They had belonged to her now deceased, diabetic grandmother. I swiped them immediately and carried them around in my purse for months before deciding to use one. Just knowing I had a needle on my person sent spikes of euphoria through me. And that was enough until I visited my mother.

That woman really makes me want to alter my reality.

Smoking meth, at this point wasn’t enough. Snorting it was a train wreck. My teeth would feel like they were falling out. My nose would bleed. My eye would bulge out of its socket. All of this takes away from the pleasure which I was seeking. If not pleasure, at least a numbing of my emotional pain. Snorting meth…